The hard truth about forgiveness

Forgiveness has occupied my thoughts lately, stirred by an enduring anger over a past situation that has left me feeling unsettled. Despite my desire to forgive, the pain, embarrassment, and disrespect I experienced continue to ensnare me in a cycle of resentment. I recently spoke with my partner about how my anger creates a chasm between myself and God. I often feel justified in my anger, convinced that I deserve the opportunity for revenge on my own terms.

This reluctance to pray stems from a fear of being guided toward forgiveness. I worry that a sincere connection with God might lead to an urge to let go of my anger, to embrace His justice instead of seeking my own. Yet, Matthew 6 reminds us that forgiveness is not merely a suggestion; it’s presented as a condition for receiving forgiveness ourselves. This principle emphasizes that to be reconciled with God, we must, in turn, extend mercy to others.

Moreover, the teachings in Corinthians highlight that failing to forgive can allow negativity to take hold of our hearts, becoming a tool for the adversary. Acknowledging the complexities of forgiveness, it's important to realize that while the act might not come naturally or feel rewarding, it serves a greater purpose. It shields us from the corrosive nature of anger and prevents hatred from taking root.

Facing this challenge head-on, I am committed to working through the process of forgiving those who have intentionally caused me harm. These individuals may never express remorse for their actions, but I recognize that forgiveness isn’t contingent upon their repentance. Instead, it is a personal journey, a way to reclaim my peace and ensure that the weight of their actions does not hinder my growth. Ultimately, this endeavor is about liberating myself from the chains of my own anger—not about them, but about me.